There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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