Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
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