Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
he fucked my hip out of place.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
