For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
