you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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