Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
His hands were made for my vagina.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
