Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize