is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
