This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
