Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
