I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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