My liver just broke up with me...
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize