He is an equal opportunity slut.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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