I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
