She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
