Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
it glows. i had to have it.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
