I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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