Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
