ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
