If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
