my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
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Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
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I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
All the doctor said was why
He corrected my spelling during sexting.