You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
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Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
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Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president