i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
