It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
