I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
