I hate all girls vehemently.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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