I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I stole a fireplace last night.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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