We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
