Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
