Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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