if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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