Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
