mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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