I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
