YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
