it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
