Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
