Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out