halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
