so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
