sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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