i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize