Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
