Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
how drunk are you?
Several
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize