I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
