we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
