i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Randomize