ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
