are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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