I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
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