I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
