I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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