i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
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