he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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