: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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